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定位切换到深圳

  • 2026-02-15 19:55:34
定位切换到深圳
与深圳的缘分，到底是比我想的要深，要浓厚，再次因为工作的关系来到这座城市，下飞机抵达酒店，处理完一些工作把日落给错过了（应该先看落日的）。傍晚时分，选择去深圳湾公园走走，不冷不热的天气，沿着步道走走停停，骑行过来拍照的年轻人，戴着耳机跑步的，遛狗的，只是经过了一些陌生人，他们也走过我，流动的周围给内心注入了一份平静，同样的下班时间有着不同的状态，似乎我更多的在自己的城市工作，反倒是来到别人的城市，要抓紧时间去逛公园，看人群，好奇的生活。
接上篇的说法，是好奇心尚未向精力妥协低头的年纪，打车去吃汶和记粥底火锅，门口小凳子围坐了一圈排队的人，提前线上取的号，到达后依旧还要等位一小时左右，为了口好吃的，我加入靠墙围坐一圈的队伍，方块手机里的世界上不了我的等位黄金档，更喜欢看看周围的人以及他们的穿搭，有个小姐姐穿得很好看，上衣是GROVE的格纹外套，白色菱纹刺绣的长裙，阿迪达斯三叶草的复古运动鞋，有品，喜欢，多看了好几眼。
网吧改造的店面，一进去就有种来这就是为了吃饭的感觉，炭火煮着粥底，是真的热热与闹闹，很喜欢这种馆子，现在的很多餐厅有些本末倒置。招牌肥牛加蛋，枸杞叶，白粥粥底，脆肉鲩，黄油焗虾，眼睛在别桌上已狂扫好几盘菜了，人少吃饭就这点不好，无法品尝到更多的菜品，店员中肯建议说：“你一个人，建议你先吃，不够再加上一两样。” 
和在上海吃的粥底火锅不一样，他们这边的粥底是单纯的米汤，由几种米配比煮成，捞出米饭留至最后再添入煮粥。第一次吃脆肉鲩，锅底里涮的几秒赋予了它脆脆的口感，配上店里的小料汁，美味像是对我此前“怎么这么多人排队”的疑惑投去一种蔑视，似乎在说“一个小时没白等吧。” 牛肉裹满蛋液，几秒的时间在锅里完成变身，不加酱汁都觉得滑嫩鲜香，想到自己还有一个焗虾，以及最后的粥，理性和胃容量告诉我，想吃其它只能以后再来了。 
枸杞叶一半烫来吃，一半混进粥里，“想喝稠一点还是稀一点的？”不知道为什么，明明我喜欢稀一些的，当时却被“稠”这个字吸引住了，脱口而出“稠一点”，嘴巴和大脑真是时常不在一个频道。舀多半勺米饭，放入姜丝，胡椒粉、枸杞叶一起慢熬，吃完前面的三样菜，我还再喝了三小碗粥，好评用空盘来写，极好。
base在深圳的同部门同事，热情的邀请我们明日一起吃早茶，一起来的另外两位同事已经应下，就剩我了。我知道我并不想去，便以想贪恋会睡眠为由婉拒。“深圳的早茶10点开始呢。” what？ 10点？我以为的早茶是像扬州趣园茶社那般，6点半就开始了。自己是个习惯按时吃早餐的人，于是又以“估计那时我已经吃过早餐，怕是吃不下早茶。”再拒。
其实到这，于我已很是不易，我并不喜也不太擅长客气与拉扯，变着花样数不尽的说辞支撑着的这门社交艺术，对手的我却来来回回就这么几句话，“我的并不想去”弱小得无法看见，或是被视而不见。同事继续输出，说难得来深圳一趟, 平时也难得聚聚, 让我别吃早餐, 工作周末再处理,并截图给我看餐厅的情况...
指尖停住在键盘上，我该怎么办？当时正好在跟龙视频，我说我再拒绝是不是有点不近人情了，他说：“那就去一下吧。”  有时候，我们询问意见，反倒让内心的想法变得更加立体和具象，于是在手机上坚定的敲出我的 “不近人情”，并骄傲的告诉龙，我还是回绝了。
借《德米安》里的一句话：“我所渴望的，无非是想试着依着我内心自发的本性去生活，为何如此之难。” 虽常有困惑，这是职场，是不是应该合群一些，多一些社交，像他们一样聚在一起，看起来有朋友，有交流，有大笑，有连接。
我的确可以去，聊一些无关痛痒的话，或是听他们吐槽工作或八卦，大家在同一个时间与空间共度了一两个小时，却不会真正heart to heart 的了解对方一点。 时间于我很重要，胃口于我也很重要，我更想尽可能的去做自己想做的事，吃自己想吃的东西 。 
当我把这件事告诉John, 特别是我用“太早了”又用“太晚了”来拒绝别人，他大笑并说道:" I applaud you. Sometimes we question ourself, but actually it’s their problem, they keep pushing and pushing, not able to read between the lines." 嗯，我也为我自己鼓掌，尽可能忠于本心的在生活。
PS：不想篇幅过于长，先到这。
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  1. CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000669s ] mysql:host=127.0.0.1;port=3306;dbname=c460;charset=utf8mb4
  2. SHOW FULL COLUMNS FROM `fenlei` [ RunTime:0.001069s ]
  3. SELECT * FROM `fenlei` WHERE `fid` = 0 [ RunTime:0.010800s ]
  4. SELECT * FROM `fenlei` WHERE `fid` = 63 [ RunTime:0.000304s ]
  5. SHOW FULL COLUMNS FROM `set` [ RunTime:0.000688s ]
  6. SELECT * FROM `set` [ RunTime:0.000232s ]
  7. SHOW FULL COLUMNS FROM `article` [ RunTime:0.001245s ]
  8. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` = 476791 LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.001529s ]
  9. UPDATE `article` SET `lasttime` = 1771448237 WHERE `id` = 476791 [ RunTime:0.003675s ]
  10. SELECT * FROM `fenlei` WHERE `id` = 64 LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.000307s ]
  11. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 476791 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.000478s ]
  12. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` > 476791 ORDER BY `id` ASC LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.001763s ]
  13. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 476791 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 10 [ RunTime:0.004829s ]
  14. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 476791 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 10,10 [ RunTime:0.005340s ]
  15. SELECT * FROM `article` WHERE `id` < 476791 ORDER BY `id` DESC LIMIT 20,10 [ RunTime:0.010081s ]
0.111678s